Trainwreck on the way of Doctor Fabray
by Austin Creek
Summary: Rachel Berry has ruined her chances on Broadway, no one wants to work with her anymore, but now she has one last chance to comeback, will she accept the offer? Doctor Fabray, her new Psychiatrist, will help her decide.
1. Doctor Fabray

September 13, 2015

"I'm here to see Dr. Fabray, I have an appointment with her."  
"Sure. Your name?"

"Berry."  
"Berry, what?"  
"Oh, Rachel Berry, you may recognize me from..."

She was promptly interrupted by the recepcionist. "Yes, I have Dr. Fabray's schedule and you do have an appointment, please take a seat, she has just received a patient and she's taking a quick break, you're up next Mrs. Berry."

Rachel was almost seated when she heard that annoying 'Mrs'.  
"Excuse me." She said, not happy, with sort of a bittersweet smile on her face.

"Yes?" The recepcionist noticed her bittersweet countenance.  
"It's Miss Berry, actually."

"Oh. I'm very sorry Miss Berry. The doctor will see you in a bit."

Rachel sat down, mumbling things to herself, low enough so no one else could hear her, quickly dialing a number. "See? I told you, no one recognizes me anymore, I told you." She said, noticeably angry and sad at the same time.

 _"Wait. I don't understand a single word of what you are saying."_

"Oh now I'm speaking Chinese to you Kurt? Is that so?!"  
 _"No hun. Calm down. What I meant was.."  
_ "It doesn't matter what you meant Kurt."

 _"Hey Rach, calm down. I meant I don't understand what you're talking about. Who's not recognizing you, and what's going on? By the way where are you, I've been trying to reach you all morning but you didn't answer or returned my calls, or emails, nothing. We have..."_

"...deadlines, I know Kurt. That's all you've been talking about lately. I know."

As she was speaking to Kurt on the phone, she didn't realize the person she was waiting for was already waiting for her and... also listening to her conversation, very observant.

"Look Kurt..." Rachel raised her eyes and saw Doctor Fabray at the door of her office, she had a very peaceful and gentle look on her face. "...I must hang up now, we talk later."

"You're ready Miss Berry?" She said. To what Rachel only nod, suddenly she was calmer. Well, only a bit, but she was. "Let's go then.

They entered into Doctor Fabray's office. As the door was closed by the soon to be Rachel's psychiatrist, Rachel stood still looking at her.

"Shall we Miss Berry?" Dr. Fabray smiled gently, pointing her the sofa right next to her and also sitting in a white armchair with a few black details.

Rachel sat down, but she continued speechless observing her new Doctor... which kind of alarmed Dr Fabray.

"Do you prefer the chaise longue? Usually my patients prefer the sofa instead of the chaise longue, since it's the first time we meet, but ultimately it is your choice."

"Rachel."  
"Excuse me, Miss Berry?"  
"Rachel, please, call me Rachel."

"Oh. Of course, if that makes you more comfortable, that's all we want, a safe environment.  
Do you want to start now and please tell me what brings you here Rachel? How can I help?"

Rachel looked confused and also shy at some point... she wasn't sure if she could trust this Quinn Fabray, this psychiatrist, she was after all a public figure, a celebrity, or so she thought.

"I'm not sure."

"You're not? Pardon me Rachel but while you were on the phone I sensed some tension in your conversation but mostly on your face, as I feel now to be honest, it isn't good keeping our emotions to ourselves, well at least all of them."

"I know... that's why I came here, because I'm under a lot of pressure actually, but..."  
"...but you're going to crack under that amount of pressure at some point, let me help you, let me try to help you."

"I'm a public fi...well, nevermind you surely don't know who I am, nobody does anymore, that's why I came here, I keep trying to convince myself that there's another solution but... there isn't."

"Okay. Well done. That's an advance, Rachel. We've made some progresses, see? You're starting to speak, and as you can see I don't bite." She smiled trying to make Rachel feel at ease.  
"I do know who you are, you starred at that Broadway show 'Funny Girl' for quite some time until..." Immediately interrupted by Rachel.

"Until I became totally unprofessional and spit on the plate from which I ate... you may say it."

"I don't know about that, I don't know all the details but we'll work on that sadness and angry you apparently have. May I know the problem you're trying to find a solution to?"

"Doctor Fabray, no one in the business wants to work with me anymore due to the amount of things that led me fired from 'Funny Girl"."

"I'm sure that's not true, you're pretty talented Miss Berry, I've watched you as Fanny."

"It's Rachel, Dr. Fabray. And thanks, I know I am, but I did indeed a lot of awful things... and yes I do have offers from low budget movies that really all they want is to see me naked, with humiliating characters and terrible storylines while they're using what's left of my 'hollywood/ broadway fame', and I'm not down for that."

"I see... proceed please."  
"So, my manager with whom I was speaking, Kurt Hummel, is pressuring me with this big offer that would bring back my name to the spotlights." And she lowered her eyes to the carpet kind of ashamed.

"What's the problem Rachel? That seems to be wonderful news, what's wrong with that offer?"

"You see Doctor Fabray... there's a part of my life that almost no one knows... except a few people, which includes Kurt, my manager. And I fear that by saying yes to this movie I may..."

"This is a safe environment Rachel, go ahead."

Rachel was once again staring at Doctor Fabray, she seemed like an angel who fell from the skies just to guide her in this difficult choice, with her perfectly combed hair, a high bun with a white ribbon on it, and a beautiful but simple white dress, sleeveless. Plus her voice was soft, a little bit raspy which kind of made her tremble – she had no idea why – she made her feel safe but also... nervous.

"Rachel? You're there?"  
"Yes." She gulped.  
"There's nothing you tell me that will leave this room Rachel, well... you didn't murdered no one, did you? Or plan to?"

Rachel frozed but only for a second, she realize it was a joke, and finally for the first time in a long time laughed, not very loud, but laughed.

"I'm glad you are laughing Rachel. Whatever the problem is, whaetever the situation is, and I understand it is your manager we are talking about, you cannot let no one pressure you enough to the point of getting into your mental health, you see what I mean?"

"But this is once in a lifetime opportunity, well at least to me, since my career is about to end if I don't do nothing about it."

"Ok. Then I am here to help you deal with it the best way. Please feel free to let me know what's bothering you."

Rachel's eyes changed direction towards the longue chaise. "I can't tell you this looking at you Doctor Fabray."

"I gather you want to lay down on that longue chaise, is that it?"

Rachel nod.

"Sure. Whatever makes you comfortable and safer, Rachel."

"So. Kurt, my manager and long time friend, he has a major Hollywood studio who wants me to lead or co-lead an upcoming film, and when I say big it will be really big, great cast, the story is good or so it seems... but the counterpart is... my romantic pair... would be... a woman." Upon saying this, Rachel could not stare Dr Fabray in the eyes, she was only staring at the ceiling.

Dramatic pause... no one said a thing for a while, not even Doctor Fabray.

"I shouldn't ask you this Rachel, but I must in order to understand your concerns, are you homophobic Rachel?"

Doctor Fabray trying her best to hide any personal opinion on that subject.

Rachel couldn't answer. Berry was petrified. She left Fabray's office in a hurry without saying a single word.


	2. Do You Want Salad?

**September, 17 2015**

"Are you okay? I didn't see you."

Quinn said upon running against someone. She didn't see who it was as she was picking up from the ground a bunch of sheets.  
No one answered to her question, which gave her time while picking the sheets to read 'Script' and something else, like a familiar name 'Rachel Berry', she immediately stood up.

"Rachel?"

Once again no one home.

"Rachel, it's me, Fabray. Quinn Fabray, I was supposed to be your Psychiatrist, we met the other day, remember? Is everything ok?"

Finally Rachel looked present, finally it seemed someone was there after all, she looked nostalgic in front of this building on 243 W-47th st.

"Here. I have your sheets." Doctor Fabray giving them to Rachel, who finally said a word.

"I used to be here all the time. This used to be my home. Not my second home but my main home to be honest." She looked lethargic.

That used to be her home indeed, when she portrayed Fanny. Not anymore.

Doctor Fabray grabbed her hand quietly, trying not to make any sudden movement.  
"Rachel I feel we started with the wrong foot, and I still feel I can help you with whatever you are going through right now, let me try."

Rachel felt lost, she could take some guidance right now, if not concerning her decision at least concerning a restaurant... somewhere away from that place... she needed to rest her mind, her spirit, and that was exactly what Fabray proposed.

"I know a restaurant not far from here called 'Tasty Salad', I don't know about you but I could have some tasty food right now, in a relaxing environment, away from all this New York buzz, what do you say?" Fabray tried to look casual and friendly so assure that Rachel would come with her instead of running away like last time.

And so they did. It was modern but also cozy. And contrary to most New York restaurants in that particular area it wasn't crowded, noisy or full of people in a rush.

"I don't know what you usually eat but I think this is a place where you can relax and take some time to ease your mind, to think about things more peacefully or to not think at all, we can just eat and relax. Whatever you want Rachel."

"I guess I could eat something and relax, yes, definetely." Berry said.  
"There it is. So, take a look at the menu, what are you eating?" Fabray asked.

"Well, I guess I'll just have... a salad." Rachel said laughing maidenlike.  
"Of course, what was I thinking? I brought you here." Rachel smiled gently, suddenly her mood was lighter, and so Quinn continued. "I'm glad to see you smile for once, you'll smile more after you have a taste, their food is great."

Rachel nodded. They had all types of salads, it was more of a restaurant that had everything from beef to fish alongside salad, it was really good, good ambiance, great food, cozy, nice staff.

They talked a lot, keeping all the stressful issues aside, they talked about one another, not deep issues but things like food, life, music, they got to know a little more about each other.  
Quinn told Rachel how she loved Billy Joel and also Sting and that she was after tickets to see Billy in a concert he was going to have in a few months, but how she couldn't find any.

They laughed, ate, they drank, they talked, everything was going smoothly.  
And so Quinn felt like it was time to ask her again.

"I don't want to bother you Miss Berry but..."

Suddenly interrupted by Rachel. "I thought we had overcome that... it's Rachel, please."  
"Of course, sorry." Laughing, Rachel liked Quinn's laugh. "I guess it's just how my brain works... when the subject is more professional I tend to be more formal with people. That must be it."

Rachel got apprehensive when she heard the ' professional subject ' part... but she remained calm and let the conversation continue.

"So, I hope you're calmer now and I also hope now that I brought you here and we talked for quite some time about more personal things and not so much about what led you in first place to meet me... I was hoping you let me understand your concerns, worries and maybe try to guide you throughout the whole process and help you come to a decision.  
Or have you already decided and let them know what's your final answer?"

Rachel sighed. "I haven't. Not yet. That's why I have the script with me. I started to read it this morning, once again, but somehow I ended up in front of the theater where I used to portray Fanny..."

Quinn nodded and let Rachel do the talking for a change, she was finally opening herself again, she thought. " I see..."

"It wasn't planned... it just happened. But yes."  
"Yes?" Quinn asked not sure what Rachel was referring to.

"Yes. Yes I could use some help and guidance, I like you Doctor Fabray, you don't look at me as some spoiled girl, some spoiled decadent actress, so I guess I feel comfortable to at least give it a try and talk to you about my concerns and fears, again."

Quinn remained cautious, yet hopeful. She tried her best to not ask her right away but it was stronger than her. "Rachel I've got to ask, and of course we will get deeper into the subject when we schedule an appointment at my office, but... what's... the main reason for you to have second thoughts on taking that part?"

"I guess... I can try to..." Just when Rachel was about to answer, a song started playing and it was enough to make everything change. "Oh no, this isn't happening..." Rachel said while covering her face with both hands. "...I can't take it, not now, not yet."

It was Barbra Streisand's _'_ I'm the greatest star _'_ song... from 'Funny Girl', not the show but the  
movie.

"Calm down, everything will be fine." Fabray said looking at Rachel who was already standing up to leave, when Quinn hold her arm tenderly. "Please don't go, wait a minute."

She went to the counter and talked to a man, in his mid thirties. And so she returned to the table, the song was over.

"What did you tell him?" Rachel questioned surprised.  
"Nothing really."  
"You must have said something, the music stopped immediately after you talked to him."

"I..."  
"Now who's having difficulties in expressing herself?" Rachel teased.

Quinn laughed through her nose. "I... just said that my friend wasn't comfortable with that song, for personal motives, and if he wouldn't mind changing it to a completely different theme. Which he did."

"He... did, indeed." Fabray said 'friend'... were they friends now? It seemed comforting and satisfactory to have someone she could call friend at that point of her life, even more if it was her Psychiatrist, her therapist.

It only took seconds for that peace to disappear. "Miss Berry? The greatest talent of this generation?" A man in a brown checkered suit, in his forties, perceptibly happy and enthusiastic asked. "Sorry to bother you Miss Berry but I couldn't leave without meeting you."

Quinn encouraged her to take the compliments with a nod towards her. To which she agreed.  
"Thanks for your kind words, Mr?" Rachel already speaking with him.  
"Oh, sorry. Richardson, at your service. I had the priviledge to see you as Fanny many times, and let me tell you something that you must be tired of hearing from people but it may not be enough, you Miss are a delight to see and to hear. It's an absolutely pleasure to have you around, such an enormous talent."

Rachel blushed but at the same time was clearly sad, although tryingto hide it. They took a photo, the man, Mr. Richardson had a polaroid, so Rachel also signed it. As he was saying goodbye he whispered in her ear. "I'm sure there's still a lot to come, a lot to see from you Miss Berry, and I tend to be right most of the times, so don't let me down. I'm sure we'll be seeing each other again in the future." He winked to both of them and left.

"Sorry. I'm very sorry. I have to leave this place. Now." Rachel said looking very upset and emotional.  
"Wait Rachel, what did that man say to let you so upset and anguished?" Quinn asked, genuinely worried.

"I just... can't. I can't. I'm sorry to leave you this way. For the second time."  
"But.."  
"I'm sorry." And so she left the restaurant in a hurry, leaving Quinn Fabray for the second time in the space of only a few days.

It was starting to become a pattern she thought, although she wasn't mad at her, she was worried with Rachel.

She did care for this girl, what Rachel could not see in herself anymore,Quinn could, she saw the best of Rachel and was willing to show her that exact side of her. She wasn't planning on leaving her side, she was planning to fight for that girl , so that she would overcome that stage of her life, it was going to be tough and toilful but she wasn't planning to quit.  
Not so fast. 


	3. Suddenly

**October 5, 2015**

It was a typical Monday.  
Quinn had arrived early, as usual to prepare her appointments, to check her agenda, make some phonecalls, etc. Her first appointment with a patient was only at 10am and it was still 8:30am when she arrived at the office.

"I tried to stop her Doctor Fabray!..." Quinn's receptionist said, noticeably angry and apprehensive.

Quinn raised her eyebrows and stopped what she was doing as she heard her receptionist, that's when Rachel invaded her office. Quinn leaned her head softly to the right while looking at Rachel and hand gestured to her receptionist saying she could leave them to what the receptionist didn't respond.

"You can leave now." Quinn said, remaining pretty calm conversely to her receptionist who seemed to be ready to go to war and Rachel was the enemy. "It's ok. Go. Please." Miss Ming, Quinn's receptionist finnaly agreed t leave them.

Quinn showed Rachel the sofa, pointing at it so she could sit down.  
Rachel was tense, it was obvious, you could see the tension on her face.

"How can I help you Rachel?" Fabray said, very neutral.  
"First of all I just want to say that I'm very sorry Dr Fabray." Rachel responded.

"Quinn." Fabray add.

Rachel nodded. "Sure, Quinn. But I am."

"I know you are." Fabray said.

"Let me finish please."

Quinn laughed through her nose. "Of course, go ahead. Take your time."

"Sorry if I seemed rude... again. I guess I have until Christmas to make it up to you..." Quinn didn't get what Rachel meant but she wasn't planning to interrupt her again. "So, before I lose my train of thought let me apologize first for the other day."

Quinn couldn't hold herself, she had to interrupt Rachel. "You mean two weeks ago." With a cute smile. 

"Yeah..." Rachel started to blush. "Yeah... you're right, sorry. I'm so sorry Quinn. I'm sorry I left you all alone at the restaurant, you had the best intentions I'm sure and I blew everything. Not to say it was the second time I did something similar..." She was clearly ashamed but she proceeded. " I'm also sorry for today's kind of dramatic entrance but I really had to speak to you and apologize, it was the least I could do. You were only trying to help me and I made myself look like crazy."

"You did not Rachel." Quinn said, smiling with her eyes.

"I didn't? Why do you keep seeing the best in me?"

"Because I simply do Rachel. You have it in you. You always had, and I will o everything I can to show it to you."

"Well, I don't doubt your intentions Quinn and to be honest..." She paused while smiling and giggling.

"Yes...?" Quinn was pretty curious.

"To be honest you are probably one of the most persistent people I recently met... no one sticks around for so long. I mean Kurt, my manager does but he stays for professional reasons." Immediately realizing what she said. "I mean... you're also for professional reasons... what I meant is he usually sticks around to persuade me to do things on his ways."

Quinn cleared her throat making an effort not to laugh, Rachel looked adorable trying to mend her words. "Sure, for professional reasons but also for... friendship? May I say friendship?"

"Yes! I would love to be friends with you Quinn." With a smile from ear to ear.

"I feel like we already are."

"I'm such a good friend... abandoning you all the time, but.."

"But... that's past! You are here now. Apologies accepted, how can I help you Rachel. Do you feel like talking today?"

"I do... that also why I came here today, do you have time?"

"Let me check with Ming, I may not have the time we need to talk about what concerns you now cause I have a patient scheduled, let me check with her. Wait here, I'll be right back."

…

" _Dr Fabray are you sure?"_

"Yes Ming, I already told you what to do and yes I'm pretty sure."

" _But Doctor Fabray... Mrs. Ambrose was already scheduled and the actress wasn't..."_

"That's enough Ming. It's Miss Rachel Berry and she's a patient too and a personal friend, so that's enough. Do as I said."

Returning to her office.

"Is everything ok?" Rachel asked.

"Yes, everything's fine. We have the whole morning and if necessary the lunch time too. Do you think we can make it?"

Berry was surprised, she did the math and according to their conversation (between Quinn and Ming) seconds ago and to the fact that she now had the entire morning to speak to her... it was clear to her that Quinn had cancelled the appointment with her patient, but why? They have only met a few weeks ago.

"This is more important." Quinn read her mind. But Rachel stood quiet and confused. "Let me ease your mind, I know we barely know each other but I really care about you and before I can say anything else that makes me seem like a creepy Psychiatrist... let's say I'm doing this for my own sake." Giggling.

"Your own sake?" Berry was lost. Again.

"Yes. To prevent a 3rd escape."

They both laugh out loud, which made Ming hastily entering the office. "Can I help Doctor Fabray? I heard some noises..."

Quinn stood up, raising her voice with a closed face. "You can be helpful by taking the morning off, go home, go take a walk, go to the park, go find someone to love and to be loved, I don't know but you may leave now Ming. I expect you to be around 4pm here, not before."

"Excuse me Doctor Fabray, but did I do something wrong?"

"You did everything wrong since you met Miss Berry, I don't know why and honestly I don't want to know why you don't like her, you don't have to, but you do have to be professional, that's what I expect you to be. At least from now on, are we clear Ming?"

"Su-Su-Sure Doctor Fabray. I'm really so-so-sorry." She left in a hurry, sobbing.

"I'm sorry Rachel. I hate reprimand someone, I never do this actually but she had it coming. But now I'm worried for her."

"Don't be sorry Quinn. It's my fault really."

"It's not."

"I noticed before that she doesn't like me for some reason."  
"I noticed to. I guess it's because I'm not usually this close to patients, this is a first too in that aspect. She'll get over it. I talk to her later, don't worry."

"I feel important now."

"You should. But don't let the pressure frighten you." Quinn teased.

"I won't. Not this time." Rachel looked proud of herself suddenly. "But before we proceed I have to ask you something."

"Of course."

Rachel heard that 'of course' happily, she loved Quinn's husky voice, she sometimes wondered why couldn't she sound like Fabray, she loved her voice for some reason. "I want to have this talk in a way I don't feel like I'm with a Psychiatrist but a friend, so can I ask you to come closer? We'll have this conversation sitting next to each other, no way I can escape."

"Although I'm your friend, and Rachel you can trust me, I am also your Psychiatrist, keep that in mind."

"I know."

"That's the only way I can help you."

Quinn moved to Rachel's sofa then.  
"Before we proceed..." Berry said.

"Look if you feel like you still can't talk that's okay, we can always speak some other time but I do have to say it would be good if you..." Rachel interrupted her immediately.

"I will speak today. Wait, it's the last time I delay this conversation. Remember we talked about how much you like Billy Joel and Sting?"

"I do, sure."

"So... can you open this? I hope I got it right." Berry looked like a kid on a Christmas morning opening presents but instead she was giving one.

"You didn't have to. Actually I'm not supposed to accept gifts from patients."

"It's not a gift from a patient. It's from a friend. Besides, no one's here to see it. Let's pretend I gave it to you outside this office, ok?"

"Okay lady. You won. I'm not trying to be rude, I'll open it."

"Yes. Now. Open it now."

Rachel looked more enthusiastic than Quinn herself, and Fabray realized it, she loved how Berry's eyes sparked, that's what she could see in Rachel that she couldn't, yet, she thought.

"What?!"

Rachel nodded continuously with a big smile on her face. "It's Sting's 25 Years The Definitive Box Set Collection, I hope you don't have it."

"Well, I do have a lot of Sting's cds but not the box set for sure."

"And... if you check inside..." Pointing. "If I may..." Rachel decided to show it herself, she definitely looked like a child. Quinn stopped in time just admiring how generous and kind she was.

"Is this Sting's hand writing?"

"It is. It says..."

" _To Quinn Fabray who, Rachel told me vigorously, is a huge fan of my music and to whom I thank the kindness, after all I'm just an Englishman in New York. ;) Sincerely, Sting."_

"You like it?" Rachel couldn't wait for Quinn's reaction. "Quinn?" Suddenly it was Doctor Fabray who seemed speechless.

"I... I absolutely love it Rachel. Not only the cds and of course for his handwritten note but mostly because you didn't have to. This genuinely creates a bonding, it's a very unpretending gesture of yours." She said, wiping a tear.

"Oh please don't cry, it was a simple gesture."

"Don't be modest." 

"Ok, I have to give it to you. Since my fame has seen better days I had to pull some strings to make it happen, but Kurt helped me, he didn't want to at first, but I explained it was his best shot to make me change my mind about the movie he wants me to star in. He immediately changed his mind and helped me."

"Well now I'm the one feeling the pressure."

"I'm kidding. Well this really happened but of course you don't have to make me do this film only because of this. Again, I'm messing everything up, am I not?"

"Come here. I'm a sentimentalist." She hugged Rachel, they both laughed. "I'll be listening to it later tonight, wonderful gift Rachel, thanks so much." Putting the Box Set aside.

"I suppose now it's the time we have that long-awaited conversation, isn't it?"

"I think it's about time, right?" Laughing through her nose. "Easy, I'm just kidding with you, I don't want to rush you if you don't feel like it's time, but I want you to know that as your Psychiatrist I am here to help you and to not judge you."

"And as a friend?"

"As a friend I am here to help you as well."

"And to not judge me as well?" Berry was apprehensive.

"Well... I can't promise to not judge you, because the human mind judges all the time even if we don't want to, we are always judging no matter what from the moment we get out of bed up to the moment we lay our head on the pillow. So, go ahead, whenever you want."

"It's not like I want to but I know I have to, I realized it these days... it's a burden I carry, I just hope this won't make things different between us." Rachel said.

"It's not like there's no one else homophobic in the World."

"I'm gay." Rachel shot.

Silence.

"I mean, I don't know. I guess I am. I can be bisexual too as far as I know. I just know that I have this thing inside me that makes me feel attracted to other women, and it has been growing and growing to the point it feels like carrying a burden cause Kurt, my manager says I can't say anything about it or be with anyone, I mean with any woman."

Rachel caught Quinn biting her lip pretty distracted, apparently still thinking about what she just said.

"Let me just... I don't understand Rachel."

"See? I told you this would make things look weird between us."

"No... that's not that." Fabray was nodding her head distracted, not noticing what she was automatically doing.

"Then?"

"What I don't get is... if you are not homophobic and if the movie is about two women falling in love, why would you feel uncomfortable to do it?"

"That's the point really. You see, Kurt want me to do this movie because it has a great director, a very prestigious cast to work with and it's a big production, but..."

"What's your concern really Rachel?"

"My concern is... I don't think I will be able to do this and continue in the shadows for much more time."

"Excuse me to ask but do you have someone to make you so eager to say something to the world right now?"

"I don't, but I won't ever have someone if I keep holding myself with a straitjacket, you see what I mean? I don't know the future, especially if I don't allow myself to explore things and understand what is really happening to me. Every single time I meet someone interesting physically or intellectually, or both really, I'm afraid to let it show."

"I see your point. But if he wants you to do this movie, he sure isn't against you exploring your choices, right?"

"No. That's where you are wrong Quinn. He does accept and to be honest almost demands me to do this movie but he absolutely discards seeing me with a woman publically, and even in the shadows he's not for it since he says people want to take advantage of me and that they will, sooner or later, make it public."

"Well... he's the one taking advantages as far as I can see..." Fabray was mad.

"Are you angry with me Quinn?"

"No. I'm mad at him. It's hypocritical and coward of him to make you do this. Not the movie but your life, Rachel ultimately it's YOUR life, that's what really matters."

"You're right. But he thinks people will start seeing me different."  
"Well they will. But different isn't bad. Why would it be? We always look different from decision to decision, imagine some clothes. You will look different with a blue or a pink blouse, it's how life is really. But ultimately it's what's inside that matters; your intelectual, your passion, your professionalism, your attitude towards people, I think you understand what I am trying to say. I don't want to be cruel Rachel but really the world outside does not care so much with other people's life as some _doubtful managers_ might think. People all around the globe have problems too and if they do worry about who you love let them have the problem, it's THEIR problem, not yours."

"You got yourself a point there. You do but he is my manager, he has helped me through some of the worst moments of my professional life so far." Rachel added.

"You said everything Rachel: your professional life. And even so I'm not sure, from the things you tell me, that he really is helping you. From where I stand, and I am not his Psychiatrist I am yours and my commitment is to you, you must start coming as priority which you are not clearly. That's the problem, you must stop sacrificing yourself in order to make other people happy."

"Right. I will give it a second thought. If I knew this conversation would be so soothing and liberating I would have had it before and would consequently have saved me from a lot of embarrassing moments."

"And... I wouldn't have now a note from Sting!"  
"Stop!"

"I'm serious. Ok, I'm not. Rachel what matters here is how you feel, honestly if you now tell me that it was _liberating_ that's all I could ask for, it doesn't really matter to me if it took 2 or 3 weeks, that's secondary."

"I feel like I hit the jackpot with you." Rachel said, holding Quinn's hand.

"Jackpot? Not so fast..."

"No, no. I didn't mean to... Quinn don't get me wrong, I didn't mean anything romantic. See? I knew things would become weird from now on."

"No they will not get weird. I said _not so fast_ cause I'm no Jackpot on my own, I'm glad you feel friendship from me but this is like almost everything in life when it comes to human relationships, you wouldn't feel or have any sort of friendship if I didn't feel something from you too, you have it in you Rachel! You do.  
I want to you to start seeing the amazing human being you are, let all the other things apart."

"Thanks Quinn! Although I still think you're being way too positive about me..." Laughing loud.

"Rachel!..."

"I'm kidding, I will take your words serious and give a second thought about the movie."

"Only if you feel like you should do it, deep inside, don't miss a good opportunity because other people make you feel uncomfortable with who you are, whoever that may be, but on the other hand don't accept the part just to make your manager's will."

"I'm hungry."

"And it makes two of us."

"Let's grab a bite, and now it's my turn to show you a restaurant."

Quinn nodded and they both went to a restaurant in NY, not that near to Fabray's office but she had send the receptionist home, she would only be back on that afternoon for the rest of Doctor's appointments. She had plenty of time. And this time it would for sure be a funny and relaxing lunch, no one would leave the other. 


	4. Bon appetit mon amie

Rachel decided to accept that part, she had no one at the moment, romantically speaking, who would make her come out to the World, so she wasn't going to say nothing about her sexuality.

She came to terms with Kurt about the movie, she would star in it and during the whole preparation to it and also during the shooting time she was free to be loose, or so she thought... she didn't read the entire terms of the contract.

For the next months she and Quinn became close friends, more than a patient-doctor relationship, it was true friendship, Rachel was grateful to Quinn for her patience, for her persistence towards her, for opening her mind concerning the part and mainly concerning herself.

They were friends for the last months and they did a lot of stuff together, they were regular visits to each other's houses, they often went to dinner or lunch, they had become really close to one another, though Rachel's time was becoming more and more limited as the preparation to her movie approached, in fact it had already begun but not in 'full time' yet, so she still had time to hang out with Quinn.

Rachel was consequently much more calmer, all of that thanks to Quinn, so Kurt was, on his turn, also thankful to Quinn who, on her turn, couldn't care less as she didn't like Kurt, not a bit for what he once did to Rachel.

In fact, she still feared his intentions, but she was determined to stick around and do her best to protect her now close friend, Rachel Berry.

December was right around the corner and Rachel had prepared a big surprised to Quinn, who had no idea at all.

 **December 17, 2015**

It was a Saturday, Rachel called Quinn to stop by so they could have dinner together.  
Nothing out of the ordinary really as she was really used to appear at Rachel's loft and vice-versa, that's how close they've gotten for the past few months.

"Wow. You have really overcome yourself Rachel, you didn't have to but I must say this is absolutely beautiful." Quinn said as she entered Rachel's loft.

Berry had it decorated fully with candles, a charming table was set with a beautiful silverware.  
As she turned to Quinn to greet her with a kiss on the cheek she also pointed a remote control to a stereo system, holding to Quinn with a one arm hug, pulling her close to her, grabbing her waist.

" _**Sometimes in life you feel the fight is over,  
And it seems as though the writings on the wall,  
Superstar you finally made it,  
But once your picture becomes tainted,  
It's what they call,  
The rise and fall "**_

"You recognize this Quinn?"

Fabray gulped. "I sure do."

"It's our song. At least it represents our song to me, cause I was at a breaking point when I met you and you made me see the best in me and realize I still had a lot ahead to conquer and to live." Rachel said with the most melting smile ever.

"Rachel... it means the world to me... everything you're doing and saying, really. I... have no words." Quinn pulled Rachel against her hugging her really tight, Rachel smiled. "I have something I want to tell you, it's been a while but now I feel like it's the time to..."

"Wait a second please, hold your thought Quinn, I have something more..." Rachel interrupted.

"You do?" Quinn responded, wiping a few tears.

Berry wiped Quinn's tears herself as also announcing something. "So, I hope you're in the mood to go out tonight, cause if you don't my surprise will be completely ruined, but that's up to you of course..."

"Rachel I don't even know what you're talking about, but obviously I don't want to ruin anything, altough I'm not sure if I'm dressed properly to the occasion."

"You are beautiful no matter what you wear Quinn, but yes you are. Perfect."  
"I am? Wow, you already made my night, such a compliment coming from the one and only Rachel Berry." Quinn joked, yet she was indeed delighted.

"I got us tickets for Billy Joel's tonight show at Madison Square Garden, I believe that's the one you were..."

"...craving for! Yes! That's the one! But how? How did you? How did you get the tickets? The tickets sold out immediately after being announced, plus tonight's show is if I'm not mistaken the most special of them all since it will be recorded and have a lot of guest stars."

Quinn couldn't stop talking, she was so excited about the fact Rachel got her the tickets and about going to her so long awaited concert.

Rachel realized it but didn't interrupt for a change. "I am speaking very fast and I'm speaking a lot, right?" The blonde Psychiatrist asked rhetorically.

To which Rachel laughed and nodded. "You are. But I'm in love with your emotive reaction and passionate demonstration. I guess I've never seen you like that, I like it, it's a completely new 'you'."

"I didn't mean to overreact but it's Billy Joel and I wanted so much to go to this concert, I can't thank you enough Rachel."

"Nonsense. I'm going too, remember? Unless you want to take someone else with you to the concert, I am intruding myself here really, I didn't even ask you. Sorry. So do you?"

"I wouldn't go with anyone else but you Rachel."

Rachel sighed in relief. "Great. Then, the night is young but we still have our dinner, so I suggest we go ahead and enjoy this bottle of wine, a friend of mine brought me from Portugal, he says it's pretty good, so let's give it a try."

"The turkey looks amazing Rach." Quinn said, still clearly amazed by all of that.

"Aww. Quinn! You called me Rach!" Berry exclaimed as she gestured holding two huge forks in her hands.

"Easy with those forks. Don't you pierce me with those!" Quinn teased. "I'm just kidding. I did call you Rach, you mind?"

Rachel sighed for a second time in the night. "I do not! Actually I find it so cute hearing you call me 'Rach', I guess that also represents how tight and strong our friendship has gotten recently, in the past months. Right?"

Quinn heard that 'friendship' word and shrank slightly. "I guess." Nodding.

"So what was it that you wanted to ask or tell me?" Rachel asked, already serving the turkey, which indeed looked delicious.

"Oh... that, nothing. Nothing at all."

"C'mon Quinn, we still have time before heading to MSG."

"Actually... I don't remember right now."

"You don't?" Berry asked frowning.

Quinn hated lying, especially to Rachel but she felt like she had to at that moment. "I really don't, it sure wasn't nothing that important, otherwise I would remember now."

"If you say so then... Bon appetit mon amie!"

"Cheers!" Said Fabray. "Great wine by the way."


	5. I Want You Just The Way You Are

They went for a couple of drinks after the show and then returned to Rachel's loft.  
Quinn was pretty tipsy already.

"You feed me better than I first fed you." Fabray said.

"What are you talking about Quinn?"

"The salad. Remember? Well, not only the salad but this whole treatment, you're killing me with kindness."

Rachel let out a laugh as she hold Quinn. "Quinn you're drunk."

"And you are beautiful." Quinn said dragging her voice "You see, I haven't said it enough, in fact I think it's the fist time I said it."

"Fist time Quinn? You mean 'first time' silly, you are wasted, come here." Berry rephrased, leading Quinn to the sofa.

"Not so fast shining star. Give me your hand, your left hand. Now grab my right hand." Fabray said standing with her body really close to Rachel's.

"Shining star? Quinn c'mon you must be tired, you better rest now, let me take you to the..."

"Take me where? I must say the idea doesn't displease me at all but since I'm staying here tonight..."

"...oh yes you are, I'm not letting you go home like that, nor am I sending you home in a cab."

"Shhhh. Enough. Don't speak."

Rachel frowned instantly. "Are you telling me to shut up?"

"No, Rach. I mean... I am. You see I may be a little bit drunk I must agree since it's taking me more energy to talk than usual, but that's not the point."

"The point would be...? And why are we still standing? Holding hands?" Rachel was confused but amused to be honest.

"Right!"  
Quinn laughed, pulling Rachel close to her right away, pretty firmly this time, landing her left hand on Rachel's waist not before pointing the remote control to the brunette's stereo system, which made Berry gulp starring at Quinn's eyes for a second.

"This is how I want you." Rachel doubted what she just heard, her ears must have misled her, she thought, cause she could swear that Quinn just said _'I want you'._

" **Don't go changing, to try and please me** **  
** **You never let me down before** **  
** **Don't imagine you're too familiar** **  
** **And I don't see you anymore** **  
** **I would not leave you in times of trouble** **  
** **We never could have come this far** **  
** **I took the good times, I'll take the bad times** **  
** **I'll take you just the way you are"**

It was Billy Joel's ' _Just The Way You Are'_ playing, Rachel faced the ceiling as the song started playing with a hidden smile on her face.

As they were slow-dancing, close to one another, Quinn turned Rachel's head back to her and started singing along some verses. "You always have my unspoken passion, I want you just the way you are... I said I love you and that's forever, And this I promise from my heart, I couldn't love you any better, I love you just the way you are."

Rachel lowered her head, smiling, blushing.

"I mean it Rachel." Quinn said.

"Of course you do..." Berry said, smiling again. "C'mon Quinn, come, let's sit." Grabbing Quinn's hand, taking her to the sofa.

"I said I love you that's forever... and this I promise from my heart." Quinn sung once again, pointing with her index finger directly to Rachel's nose, who giggled and nodded.

"You need water."  
"I need you. Come here." Tapping on the sofa. Slowly approaching and suddenly kissing Rachel's neck, really slow, really tenderly. Rachel got goosebumps, which got Quinn alert, and so she started kissing her softly biting her neck as well.

"Wait." Rachel said almost out of breath.  
Quinn intensified her moves.  
"Wait." Rachel said again. "You... you gotta stop Quinn. Please." Slowly pushing her away.  
"Why? I want you Rachel. Don't you want me too?"  
"I... yes, I guess."  
"You.. guess?"

"I mean, you're way too drunk to remember tomorrow."  
"I don't know about that but..."  
"But... let me bring you water and then we may talk about it again."

"I don't wanna talk lady..." Quinn teased, winking at Berry, who had now a serious face. "Ok, ok... I guess you are right, bring that water, it's the only way I'll remember, or at least have a chance to, tomorrow... the only way I'm aware of what my options and decisions are."

"Wise choise Doctor Fabray." Rachel said... clearly teasing Quinn.

"Oh! Look now who's being a provocateur?" Quinn responded, waiting for her water.

And so Rachel returned with a bottle full of water.

"Now that's being extreme... instead of taking decisions I'll be spending the whole time heading to the toilet." Quinn joked.

"Don't be silly or a jokester, just drink the water Quinn."

Quinn started drinking only to stop and say something that got Rachel speechless and made her turn pink. "Hey Rach, you were gasping while back... am I right? I must have done something right..." Fabray bantered, throwing a huge smile.

Rachel sighed. Without realizing. Immediately trying to cover her sigh. "Keep drinking, the bottle is half full Quinn."

"As far as I can see Rach the bottle is half empty."

"Doctor Fabray, half empty, now that's being a pessimist, maybe we should work on that at your office someday..."

"We'll work on something but not on that, stop the talking, I'm way better now, truly aware of what's going on, come here Rachel." Quinn put down the bottle and reached for Rachel's arm, quickly turning her against the sofa, sitting on top of her, with each of her legs apart with Rachel's body in between.

"Was that a wrestling move Doctor Fabray?" She asked, frowning and smiling at the same time.

"Who knows... there's more to come Miss Berry."  
"There is?..."

"You can bet your beautiful brown eyes... I will wrestle for you until the end of times Rachel Berry."  
"That's the most beautiful..."

"Shhh." Quinn covered Rachel's eyes with her hands, drawing invisible lines all over her face, Rachel gasped, panted and smiled, she then drew lines on Rachel's lips, who corresponded to Quinn's touch by taking Fabray's hands away and by doing the same thing to Quinn's lips with her bare hands.

Fabray locked Rachel's hands and arms over her head and slowly started kissing Rachel's lips, very softly and pretty superficially, alterning to Rachel's cheeks and neck and finally to her belly, Rachel was wearing a beautiful black dress with a cut part in the middle which had a form of an ellipse.

Quinn noticed that Rachel's belly was contracting at every kiss she gave, which kind of turned her on even more.

"Stop Quinn." Rachel said almost out of breath.  
"Ok... I stop." Quinn knew it wouldn't last long, she could see Rachel was now craving for more.  
"Why did you stop? Don't stop."  
Fabray laughed out loud, grabbing Rachel by her waist with one hand, pushing her close to her.

"I knew it wouldn't last long..." Ascending with her hand from Rachel's waist to Rachel's face just to grab Berry's face and hair and start kissing her on the lips, Rachel kissed her back and so the kiss became vigorous and intense, Rachel never felt a more intense or deep kiss.

They were like a tuned orchestra, just when Quinn whispered on Rachel's ear. "I love you Rachel Berry."

Berry immediately pushed her away from her, jumping off the sofa.  
"What happened?" Quinn asked confused.

"I can't, I just can't. This is wrong Quinn."

"Wrong? Rach I could see you were enjoying as much as I was, c'mon there is nothing wrong here. Ok I get it, we started as patient-doctor, but that can all be fixed by ending our patient-doctor relationship."

Rachel started rambling around her living room. "I... I can't. It was the heat of the moment, but I can't Quinn and neither can you."

"Rach I'm done. Really, I just don't get it. It was something I did, something I said?"  
"You..."

"It was the _'I love you'_ I said?"

Rachel did not answer and moved on. "I'll bring some blankets, you can... you can take my bed and I'll sleep here on the couch."

"Nonsense. Of course I'll stay here tonight since I'm in no conditions to go home right now, I'm still tipsy and tired but I won't take your bed, I'll stay here, I take the blankets though."

And so she did. She stayed at Rachel's loft, she slept on the couch, while Rachel slept on the bed, or so she tried for quite some time, her mind didn't stop for a minute until she finally fell asleep.


	6. Let us have some tea

The next morning Rachel woke up immediately looking for Fabray but... no Quinn.

She then went to Fabray's office.

"Oh no, no, no Miss Berry. Where are you going?"

"Where do you think I'm going? I'm going to Dr. Fabray's office, that's where I'm going."

"Oh no you're not."

"Oh yes I am. Who's going to stop me, you Ming?"

"If I have to." Fabray's receptionist said, blocking Rachel.

"Excuse me but what do you think you're doing? I need to talk to Dr. Fabray, your boss, and I will. In fact I don't think she will be happy when she hears what you're doing here. I really don't, so step aside. Now. Please."

"You see Miss Berry it was Dr. Fabray who asked me to not let you disturb her, no matter what." - Ming said, with a very sarcastic look on her face, to what Rachel had no immediate response.

"She did?" - Rachel said, almost in disbelief.

"Oh yes... So may I ask you politely to walk away, to leave the building Miss Berry?"

"Oh Ming... I see what you're doing here. But trust me I will talk to Dr. Fabray one way or another."

"I don't think so... I don't know what happened but let's just say she wasn't happy about it... Now excuse me I have calls to answer, and a job to do."

"Oh right, a job to do, to make other people's life a living hell..." And she left the building.

Rachel was stressed and confused but she wasn't taking a 'no' for an answer.

She went home, calmed herself down and made call after call trying to reach Quinn.

No one answered. She left an enormous amount of voicemail messages. Nothing.

She was going crazy... she had to talk to Kurt and call for some help, after all it was her manager who persuaded her to go there in the first place thus he might help, in her head he would acknowledge the importance of Quinn in her life lately, as a friend of course.

"I need your help."

 _"Sure Rachel, how can I help? But first why didn't your answer me yesterday?"_

"What do you mean? Yesterday?"

 _"Yes... yes... I called you a thousand times, it kept ringing and went straight to voicemail."_

 _Oh shit I can't tell him I was with Quinn... well not everything at least, he will never support it, and won't help me..._ \- Rachel thought right before answering him. "I...yeah I was with Quinn Fabray, you know, my Psychiatrist who has been more of a great friend lately."

 _"Right... how would I forget her, the one I recommended you and also the one who made you realize the importance of this role... of this film."_

"Of course..." Rachel wasn't going to discuss it, she just needed his help to make it to Quinn. "So, what happens is we kind of had a date last night and..."

Promptly interrupted by Kurt. _"You said what?"_

"A girls' night out.." Rachel responded after understand she said ' a date '.

 _"No... I believe you said 'date'..."_

"No I didn't..."

 _"Don't try to fool me Rachel, I know what I heard... and you know what you said. You also know that by accepting this role in this upcoming film you will be under the watching eye of this industry's community if not under the world's watching eye as well."_

"You think?"

 _"Oh I really do Rachel. This could be our big comeback.."_

"Our?"

 _"Manner of speaking. So before you go any further you will take what happened and stop it right away. I am going over there to help you to pack your bags and we are going to L.A today."_

"But Kurt..."

 _"No buts..."_

"You are being way too extreme, don't you think?"

 _"No, I don't. You will have to trust me on this one Rachel." Kurt Hummel could be very persuasive but he could tell she was sad about the situation, he was not going to dig deep and understand what really happened so he was just going to push a little more to make sure things were like he wanted them to be. "Maybe Rachel dear this was for the best..."_

"No it wasn't." Now Kurt went a little further than he should have. "You don't even know what happened, and I really just wanted you to help me get her on the phone, I was rude and I want to apolo..."

 _"Stop! Stop right there, I don't want to know and you girl need to focus on what's important right now. I'll be there in a minute. Don't do anything crazy until I get there. We talk it over when I get there. Ok?"_

Kurt wasn't kidding when he said 'a minute', well sure he did take more than a minute but he was fast as a cheetah to get to Rachel's place.

"Rachel dear, I'm here for you..." He said while hugging the former broadway star.

"Thanks Kurt, I thought about it and..."

"...and did you pack your bags?"

"Stop interrupting me. Please. I'm stressed out. Honestly I'm tired, I didn't sleep well and you keep interrupting me. But yes I started packing, it's almost everything there but then I thought about it and I can't leave New York without clarifying this whole situation with Quinn. I just can't. So if you want me to go to L.A before what we had planned ... well then you better help me here." Rachel decided to stop nodding to everything her manager said and take matters into her own hands. "Now, will you or..." Again... interrupted.

"You are absolutely..."

"AGAIN KURT? SERIOUSLY? I JUST EXPLAINED YOU HOW I AM FEELING AND ASKED YOU TO STOP INTERRUPTING ME." Berry was noticeably mad but she was also so physically and emotionally drained, tired, she could start crying any minute now.

Kurt looked very tender answering her laying his right hand on her left shoulder and smiling. "I know dear. It was the last time. But it's for a good reason, I was saying you are absolutely right. We will do just that. I will do everything I can to make sure you two have a nice talk before we go to L.A. Trust me, ok?"

"Ok..." She said with some hiccups in between.

"Now, take a seat, relax..."

"But you said..."

"I know, I know... but first let us have some tea... it will calm you down... trust me."


End file.
